Finding Your Way - Through Your Why

Tag: goals

photo of people near wooden table

There is no “I” in “DREAM”

I was listening to one of my favorite podcasts recently while traveling to a mastermind retreat. The podcast is hosted by Alex Sanfilippo and is centered around creating a brand. In one of his podcast episodes, the phrase, “There is no “I” in “dream” was brought up. I absolutely loved this concept. While this message seems simplistic enough, I thought I would try and elaborate a bit more on its truth.

We have to Lead before we Achieve

A man feeling great about attaining goals and dreams
Photo by ROMAN ODINTSOV on Pexels.com

As I reflect back on my life, what becomes ever more clear is that “I get” when “I give.” Now, that said, the giving has to come from a place in the heart that is genuine and without reciprocation. What I mean by this is simply doing right by others out of pure compassion, understanding, empathy, and love.

The universal constant in my life has proven this to be true. When we come to the table with the right intention of truly giving and serving, our world of potentiality really opens up. We get back more than we often give – at least that has been the case in my life.

When I say we “have to lead,” I’m not talking specifically about needing to be in positions of leadership. Rather, what I am saying is we have to think of others before we think of ourselves. As long as we have what we truly need in life, we need not seek over-abundance. When we lead our lives in this manner, we receive MORE in return.

It also need not be about only giving in forms of charity. Instead, it is more about leading with your thoughts more for service and how you help raise up and support the people around you. This can be done in any of the below following ways:

  • Offer support and be a good sounding board when needed
  • Provide random acts of kindness
  • Give people more compliments over criticisms
  • Begin your goals with how it improves the lives of others over yourself
  • Live the “Golden Rule” – doing unto others as you want for yourself

Begin with “Why” over “What” or “How”

Begin with the why over the what or the how
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

When we are seeking how to achieve our dreams and goals, we must begin with the end in mind. Why are we aiming to achieve what we want? This is the underlining starting point.

When our objectives are completely about us and how we attain more without regard to the impact on others, goals are harder to achieve. It’s not impossible to obtain goals that are “self-centered.” However we are far more likely to see long term benefit when the main goals are focused on what we give to each other by attaining our goals.

Take health goals for example. Most people would likely see that attaining good physical and mental health is solely the benefit of the individual. In actuality when we achieve overall good health and wellness we are then able to better serve our purpose to the world. Without good mental and physical health we will never be our best selves, limiting our potentials.

Too often we begin with “what” we want to do or “how” we are going to do it. Beginning with “the why” is crucial for the purpose. “WHY” do we want what we want? The ego will often spill over into our thoughts with its own desires and needs. It tries to help us with this instinctive process as its only trying to improve our living situation. What the ego can’t see however is that we will benefit far more through the proper intention.

Nearly all dreams and goals can be thought of this way. It does require some mental reconditioning, but we can rewire our thinking so that we’re always in the right frame of mind when it comes to our goals.

Life need not be all about You

brown wooden cubes
Photo by Shamia Casiano on Pexels.com

When it comes to understanding the concept of “there is no “I” in “Dream,” – it simply comes down to realizing what we do can’t always be about us.

I’ll never suggest that as caring individuals we allow ourselves to be taken advantage of. We do need to keep our guard up enough to not fall victim to ill intent. However, with enough of the right intention, it is my belief that the Law of Attraction will guide us.

When we put out the right intentions we are going to receive those same intentions back into our lives. Once we climb Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs to a high enough point of perspective, we have a choice to make.

Once we have the basic physiological, safety, and connection – we then decide if we are going to make life more about ourselves or the betterment of society.

There is nothing wrong with improving oneself. But that should be our main focus. The only competition we truly need is internally against ourselves rather than outdoing our peers and neighbors.

It is at this point that complete self-actualization occurs and we begin to think about leaving our legacy. Our dreams can become more about improving ourselves along with those around us. We come to understand that there is no “I” in “Dream.”

How do you feel about this perspective? Please feel free to leave a comment or speak to any life experiences that you would like to share. I’m always looking to engage in more thought provoking conversations…

Reflections…

The time of year has come to reflect on what was and look forward to what is coming. I wanted to take pause and put some thought out on how I’m looking back, in order to move ahead as positively as possible. A friend and Mastermind Leader of a group I am in threw this out to our group today as a good platform for as we enter the new year:

3 things that I am most proud of:

  • 60lbs of weight loss (I was 250lbs at the end of 2019, now much healthier 190lbs)
  • 365 days of legitimately beating my 1000 calorie move goal and exercising every day this year never taking a day off from physical activity
  • Investing in myself – joined a Mastermind Group, read 15+ books, listened to hundreds of podcasts while doing my morning exercise, began writing my 1st book

3 things I need to do differently:

  • Make more time for fun activities with my wife – could be playing board games, cooking with her, watching movies, or really just anything she wants to do. 2020 has limited us in our abilities to have fun how she and I used to with travel, so I need to prioritize time versus just “sitting at home with her.” That isn’t the “kind of time” I want to spend with her. It needs to be of higher quality
  • Commit to a meditation routine for 20 mins daily without fail
  • Plan daily / weekly initiatives, outside of work, so I can insure I accomplish personal goals

Top 3 greatest influencers for me:

  • James Clear – “Atomic Habits”
  • Dave Asprey – “Super Human”
  • John Baines – “The Stellar Man”

Smartest Decisions I made:

  • Investing in a Mastermind Group (I’ve seen great connections and bridges open up for me out of the group I attend bi-weekly since September)
  • Choosing my health and fitness over any other excuse not to
  • Investing in Overstock.com before online shopping grew exponentially (was more luck, but I fell into it with a small investment that paid off as the stock soared due to everyone staying home and being online)

Most caring acts of service:

  • My volunteering for hospice care (although this had to stop due to obvious circumstances in the present world environment)
  • Mentoring 3 different individuals throughout the year
  • Volunteering time to serve meals to those less fortunate through the holiday season

Biggest risks:

  • Cashing out of my Bitcoin stake and moving into a lesser known crypto currency (I believe this will payoff far more than my Bitcoin gains in the future but time will tell – all investments in crypto are high risk / high reward)
  • Writing a book (only because I truly don’t know where that future is taking me)
  • My foray into FOREX trading of currency (just toying around with it to learn right now, but again – high risk / high reward)

Most important relationships improved:

  • My relationship with my wife – even during the challenges of this year, I feel her and I are closer than we’ve ever been. We have aligned on “similar paths” of focus and interest in 2020 that is helping us bond at higher levels
  • My relationships with my family – while it never seems enough to me, I talk more with them and see them more than I have in years past
  • My relationship with the team I lead – I am responsible for 6 highly unique individual leaders, that I feel in my second year in position, has really seen our professional cohesiveness as a team grow stronger

One word that best describes all of 2020:

  • “Mental-Fortitude” – okay it’s technically two words by I hyphenated them to make it seem like one 😉

3 things to do less of in 2021:

  • Less time perusing apps on my phone (I’ve already cut out most all TV – now time for the wasted time on my phone – time is our greatest asset and I want as much of it productive as humanly possible)
  • Less time spent on politics – I simply cannot control it so I cannot allow the frustration to set in that at times can consume me
  • Staying up late – I want to ensure my days begin no later than 5:30am everyday for all that I want to accomplish in the New Year (personally and professionally)

3 things to do more of in 2021:

  • Weekly practicing to learn guitar (just bought a brand new guitar that I’m learning and can’t wait to become proficient on it)
  • Weekly practicing of my Spanish as I aim to be able to hold full conversations in the language
  • Write 500 words each day to contribute to my 1st book as well as my new blog “Ungraduated.com”

3 things to stop doing in 2021:

  • Stop making any excuses for not prioritizing my wife first before all else – she has been my rock and my soulmate as we’ve been together 20+ years…I will not take our time together for granted
  • Stop drinking completely during the week and limit drinking to just 2 times at most monthly (every other weekend for one evening of the weekend)
  • Stop my incessant daily Starbucks habit and cut it back as I work to get on 100% organic coffee

My personal Mantra for 2021 – “BE WITH ABUNDANCE

There is so much I have to be thankful for in my life and I know that it is my daily attitude, thoughts, and constant gratitude that will bring even more abundance into my life from the universe. This is so that I can continue to bring what I aspire after into the world for the impact that I hope to make for those around me.

For the many challenges 2020 has brought, there is much goodness laying within it. I hope this post helps bring some self-realization for anyone that may read it and perhaps challenge some similar thoughts and reflections.

May 2021 be of happiness, success, and peace for all that are seeking it to be so…

Powered by WordPress.com.